I'm turning my back on a certain mindset.  Part of my solstice ritual will be killing off a part of me that isn't serving me as a Wiccan or a person.

It is the part that jumped on the Christians Stole Christmas From The Pagans bandwagon.

In its place, I'll be reborn as a different kind of Wiccan.  One that doesn't feel, somewhere deep down, that I have to validate my faith by playing the "we were here first" game. 

That is not to discount the history, theology, philosophy or much-enjoyed debate of it all.  I'm not speaking of the lofty pursuit of knowledge and ideas.  I'm speaking of the ugly, petty aspect of it.  The part of it that people use to explain why we, as Pagans, are better than other people.  And even sadder, why we are RIGHT.  It makes us what we say we aren't.

I am really very excited about it.  I'm already feeling good, already feeling some kind of weight come off me.  Coming to terms with my own personal doubts about my faith is HUGE.  Just seeing that doubt is what had me latch on to that constantly perpetuated thought process is HUGE.  But even bigger, more moving and inspiring is looking forward without the doubt.

It's okay that this faith is less than a century old.  IT'S OKAY.  It is perfectly capable of standing on its own without the crutch of lineage.  Wicca does not need a millenia of existance backing it to be valid. 

More importantly, I do not need a millenia of existance backing my religion to validate myself.